(a continuation of my “self realization” post from eight decades ago)

I said this a while ago and I’m going to say it again: I am not a serious blogger. I am a serious blogger. I am not a serious journal keeper. I am not a serious writer. I am not a serious human. I don’t mean serious in that I take things that are important to me seriously. I mean serious in that I try to be this inspirational/deep human being and it turns out that I am not. I have never been. I always feel like I try so hard to write something that people will read when I die and think “wow this is such an inspiration to all human lives” when all I really want to be is David Sedaris writing about that time my brother thought I got attacked my gnats outside my house. Or that time some woman from the corporate offices basically thought I couldn’t pronounce my own name correctly. I always want to be that cool quirky blogger but then I sit down at my computer and start writing this long winded flowery sentences and it makes me want to vomit. That’s not me. Nope. And I think this whole thing that I have is the reason that I haven’t written too often because I feel like I have nothing good to say but who cares???? Maybe what I am saying is very good and you’re all just too not good to realize it.